Category: Shame
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Adult Virgin? Reclaim Your Confidence and Overcome Shame
Being an Adult Virgin—a term often used to describe people who have not had sex into their late twenties, thirties, forties or later—can feel particularly isolating, especially for men. It’s the shame of an internal critic that whispers, You should have had sex by now. Adult virginity is not the kind of story often told…
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Coaching for Productivity: Procrastination vs Perfectionism
Coaching for productivity is an approach I take with people who meet with me for therapy around perfectionism and procrastination. As a counsellor who specialises in working with ‘pornography addiction’, procrastination is something I hear about often. Perfectionism often comes up in my conversations with gay men who feel ‘not good enough’ despite striving for…
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Recovering from Religious Trauma: Therapy with a Secular Counsellor
Meeting with a secular therapist is a good first step for recovering from religious trauma. ‘Religious Trauma’ describes the psychological distress caused by abusive religious practices, teachings and institutions. It can take many forms, including spiritual abuse, indoctrination, or a traumatic event associated with faith. Religious trauma can have a profound impact and long-lasting effects…
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How to Treat ‘Sex Addiction’: The Role of the Therapist
Is sex addiction really a legitimate mental health problem or just an excuse for sleeping around? That was the question Tom Tilley used to open the Hack Live Sex Addicts programme shown on Australia’s public tv broadcaster the ABC this week. I’m sure a lot of viewers were hoping to get a handle on their…