Tag: shame
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Masturbation Addiction: Breaking Free from the Urge Cycle
Over recent months, more men have contacted me concerned about what they describe as masturbation addiction. This is in addition to those who already seek support around pornography addiction and sex addiction, areas I’ve supported men around over many years in Sydney and online. But the recent rise in concerns about masturbation seems to be…
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Adult Virgin? Reclaim Your Confidence and Overcome Shame
Being an Adult Virgin—a term often used to describe people who have not had sex into their late twenties, thirties, forties or later—can feel particularly isolating, especially for men. It’s the shame of an internal critic that whispers, You should have had sex by now. Adult virginity is not the kind of story often told…
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Coaching for Productivity: Procrastination vs Perfectionism
Coaching for productivity is an approach I take with people who meet with me for therapy around perfectionism and procrastination. As a counsellor who specialises in working with ‘pornography addiction’, procrastination is something I hear about often. Perfectionism often comes up in my conversations with gay men who feel ‘not good enough’ despite striving for…
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Treatment for Pornography ‘Addiction’ to Recover Mental Health
Treatment for pornography ‘addiction’ is increasingly in demand. Compulsive use of harmful pornography can be destructive to your mental health, your relationships, and your sexual functioning. The Internet and smartphones have exposed an entire generation to violent, abusive pornography from an early age. Realising you have a problem with using pornography might lead you to…
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How to Treat ‘Sex Addiction’: The Role of the Therapist
Is sex addiction really a legitimate mental health problem or just an excuse for sleeping around? That was the question Tom Tilley used to open the Hack Live Sex Addicts programme shown on Australia’s public tv broadcaster the ABC this week. I’m sure a lot of viewers were hoping to get a handle on their…
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Benefits of Online Counselling for Men who are Gay and Married (to a woman) or Older Men Coming Out
If you are a man in your forties, fifties or older, taking the first steps towards identifying as gay or bisexual can feel difficult and frightening. You are not alone. Many men have made this journey before you. And therapy with a supportive and affirming gay counsellor over webcam or through telephone counselling offers a…