Tag: shame

  • Masculinity Crisis: Stuck in the Manosphere Shame Loop

    Masculinity Crisis: Stuck in the Manosphere Shame Loop

    Am I masculine enough? Strong enough? Successful enough? Desired enough? The masculinity crisis is real and affecting male mental health. Many men who feel this way start searching for answers online, wondering if something is wrong with them, their masculinity, or even their biology. For some men, these questions sit quietly in the background. For…

  • Masturbation Addiction: Breaking Free from the Urge Cycle

    Masturbation Addiction: Breaking Free from the Urge Cycle

    Over recent months, more men have contacted me concerned about what they describe as masturbation addiction. This is in addition to those who already seek support around pornography addiction and sex addiction, areas I’ve supported men around over many years in Sydney and online. But the recent rise in concerns about masturbation seems to be…

  • Adult Virgin? Reclaim Your Confidence and Overcome Shame

    Adult Virgin? Reclaim Your Confidence and Overcome Shame

    Being an Adult Virgin—a term often used to describe people who have not had sex into their late twenties, thirties, forties or later—can feel particularly isolating, especially for men. It’s the shame of an internal critic that whispers, You should have had sex by now. Adult virginity is not the kind of story often told…

  • Coaching for Productivity: Procrastination vs Perfectionism

    Coaching for Productivity: Procrastination vs Perfectionism

    Coaching for productivity is an approach I take with people who meet with me for therapy around perfectionism and procrastination. As a counsellor who specialises in working with ‘pornography addiction’, procrastination is something I hear about often. Perfectionism often comes up in my conversations with gay men who feel ‘not good enough’ despite striving for…

  • Treatment for Pornography ‘Addiction’ to Recover Mental Health

    Treatment for Pornography ‘Addiction’ to Recover Mental Health

    Treatment for pornography ‘addiction’ is increasingly in demand. Compulsive use of harmful pornography can be destructive to your mental health, your relationships, and your sexual functioning. The Internet and smartphones have exposed an entire generation to violent, abusive pornography from an early age. Realising you have a problem with using pornography might lead you to…

  • How to Treat ‘Sex Addiction’: The Role of the Therapist

    How to Treat ‘Sex Addiction’: The Role of the Therapist

    Is sex addiction really a legitimate mental health problem or just an excuse for sleeping around? That was the question Tom Tilley used to open the Hack Live Sex Addicts programme shown on Australia’s public tv broadcaster the ABC this week. I’m sure a lot of viewers were hoping to get a handle on their…